99, 98, 97 The Countdown Continues

Three more reasons to recognize the end of Bush's presidency in my 100 Days Countdown:

#99. Project for the New American Century. This is the neo-conservative "think" tank which lobbied you, Mr. President, into war with Iraq...before you even read "My Pet Goat." The group, made up of Bush All Stars such as Cheney, Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz, Perle, Bolton, Armitage, and Fox News’ William Kristol had a mission to bring “regime change” to Iraq and was funded by such American patriots as The Scaifes who spent millions of their millions making up shit about Bill Clinton. Frustrated President Clinton did not invade Iraq and take its oil, on their recommendation in 1998, the PNAC team infiltrated your administration and began laying the groundwork for your ill-fated mission. On September 20, 2001, with the nation still mourning its losses and understanding the depths of terrorism and al Qaeda, you received a letter from PNAC urging again that the US defense mechanisms be employed in Iraq. Sure, there were contracts to be gotten, and most of PNAC’s leadership would profit.

So was it a surprise that you began telling tales about Sadaam and mushroom clouds and yellow cake? Not really. You were surrounded by oilmen who had a lot of investment in defense contracts. Cynical? Maybe then. But not any more.

#98. Ari Fleisher. The first in a tragic stream of liars sent to the podium daily to spin the slow decline of approval. Ari’s greatest hits include:
A. Telling Americans that burning fossil fuel was part of the "blessed" American way of life. Driving big cars was fine; in fact, the President would not stand in their way. Nice going.
B. Allowing Jeff Gannon (or whatever his real, male-prostitute name was) press access – despite his consistently signing in to the WHITE HOUSE with a different name than on his credentials; despite his oft-lobbed softballs used to change the subject in a heated press room; and then pleading ignorant when even 15-year-old computer-lab students could Google Gannon’s bio within a minute of the truth breaking.
C. Spoiler Alert: You figure in two of the biggies that will land in the Top 3 coming next January!!!!

#97. Stupid Comments on the 7’s: I’ll highlight some of the things you said which embarrassed me most every ten spots from here down.

"And so, in my State of the—my State of the Union—or state—my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation—I asked Americans to give 4,000 years—4,000 hours over the next—the rest of your life—of service to America. That's what I asked—4,000 hours." —Bridgeport, Conn., April 9, 2002

The Last 100 Days

Today is the day we celebrate the final 100 days of George W. Bush's Presidency. It may sound harsh to use the term "celebrate" but because we live in the greatest democracy on the globe we are often righteous is sitting quietly in protest of our leaders' actions, while knowing that we, the electorate, will have our say and there will either be change or a re-employment of that which we approve of. The key is that it will be peaceful and principled. Well, I have sat quietly, along with many millions who, over the past eight years, have watched this President abuse power, trash the Constitution, lower the expectations of government, shame the good name of the U.S., stumble over itself, disregard the People, and attempt to erase two hundred years of progress towards peace and prosperity.

Sound unfair? Join me for the next 100 days as I count down my own, personal, list of the 100 reasons to celebrate the end of this administration. Is it stupid? Sure. But on this list will be more high crimes and misdemeanors than any President ever before - even one I can think of who was actually impeached! These will come in no particular order, save for maybe the top 10 or 25. By then I'll probably be too depressed to rank them.

#100. Those First Days. In those first weeks after the election we saw every facet of your character that we would come to despise over the course of your reign. I do not argue that because Al Gore won the popular vote he should have been President. I believe the Electoral College is the system we use for good reason. If you won the electoral votes, then yes, you should have won the election.

But what we knew then was that Katherine Harris was both responsible for atrocious deficiencies in the Florida elections overseen by your brother; and was your campaign co-chair. Her crimes, and yes, they were crimes, are now legendary - as is your employment of cronyism with some of the worst cronies a guy can have! As the country became more divided, you employed James Baker to fight legitimate recounts – all the way to the Supreme Court. Before you ever took office you displayed an arrogance that would only foretell the unilateral, narrow minded decision-making to come.

Teen Alligator

I have a teenager as of tomorrow. A beautiful, smart, funny, talented, sweet, amazing teenager. Does that make me old? No. That makes her old.

I think X and I are doing pretty well for the circumstances. She's not 40 so I think she does not see this as such a big deal. But I am 40 and I need somebody to reassure me that my daughters will stop growing up some day. I don't want to imagine - I CANNOT - imagine a life where they are not the first faces I see in the morning and the last before I crawl off the couch, trip over their towels left in the hall, and head to bed.

But enough about me. Let me tell you about America's newest teen sensation. Allison, as you may know, came to us under very odd yet powerful circumstances. She was the cutest child ever to grace the planet for almost three years. She walked. She spoke. She could sing most of Rockin' Robin before she was out of diapers. She could read before she knew how. She loved Mary Poppins. She still loves Mary Poppins.

That's what is most awesome about Alligator. She has not changed much over the past 13 years. Sure, she's taller and can now do dishes like nobody's business; but she is also gentle, and careful, and peaceful. She takes time to think about how she sees the world. She keeps friends dear, and her mom is her hero. Her patience drives us nuts. We often remark that her greatest accomplishment was possibly the raising of her younger sister Campbell. She has had a lot more impact than mom and dad I think.

I have been playing music with Allison lately and I hope one day we'll share some of the songs we play. She has a great voice and loves cool songs. She also loves "Wicked" but I am hoping she'll grow out of it - but secretly, I hope she never does. I hope she never stops singing Disney songs, and watching Little Bill with my niece because she actually may like it more. I hope she gets through these teen years never being afraid to sing out loud, to act like the world will just work itself out, and to start her path to adulthood with the same conscientiousness she brought into that wild night in 1995.

Mostly, I hope she makes her teen years last forever.

Rhythm Akimbo - 13

Camera Obscura - Teenager

The Ting-Tings - Happy Birthday

"How Long Have I Been At This? 5 Weeks?"

Well, its over. The families are taking the stage. Even Bristol. Or is that Willow? So now comes the analysis. Some will say Sarah stole their hearts tonight...

...I'll just add that she is probably eating them voraciously backstage.

And wiping her mouth with the Constitution.

Xtina won Palin Bingo tonight. She had the following:
Maverick
Obama
National Guard
Bailout
Heart land

She also had:
Drill
National Guard
Air Space (Center square pic of Palin)
Job Creation
Tax Belief

I had:
Alaska
Special Needs
Air Space
Hockey Mom
Terrorists

The girls did not get bingos although they did check out to do homework, and for being frustrated that none of the cards had a spot for "darn right" and "heck yeah."

An Open Letter to Joe Biden

Because I recently posted a list of discussion points I would like to have with Sarah Palin (by the way, she has not responded to my letter), it is fair and balanced that I provide equal time and concern for the Democrat’s nominee for Vice President. Now, up until a few weeks ago I mocked all things “bloggy.” I hated the term (actually still think its silly) and found no interest in any wisdom culled from the “blogosphere” (possibly the dumbest fake osphere there is). But then came the RNC Convention and the Talking Points attacks on the “elite media” who were inquiring as to the background, experience, and views of the new conservative Vice Presidential nominee. Since no national print, network or cable press organization were allowed to talk to the nominee, the only folks doing the vetting happened to be bloggers.

Folks, I am in a recliner right now in the recline position. I am watching last nights Letterman (how perfect is Julia Louis-Dreyfus?) on the DiVo. I barely have shorts and a t-shirt on, and I am eating a nectarine. I am sure I am elevating the professionalism level of those “elite” media organizations who dared to find out what the RNC did not want you to know. But, I digress. Back to the Ten Things I Want to Say to Joe Biden, as we near the Veep Debate this Thursday.

10. Land of the Lost. Please, Joe, tell me that you know that dinosaurs and humans did not co-exist as claims your opponent. Yes, Will and Marshall and Holly (as well as Cha-Ka) ran from T-Rex and friends on a fantasy tv show when the Governor and I were children – but I’d like to believe that those episodes were not run alongside The Flintstones on the Alaskan Discovery Channel.

9. Get On Top of Your Past Pt. 1. Somehow you have avoided having to be re-wrung over the 1988 campaign in which you were smacked out of the ring for alleged plagiarism. Although plagiarism was not your mistake, allowing it to fester under your admirable career, was. Before the vast Rove wing conspiracy brings out Mikey D’s old campaign ads, be sure you have a team of defeaters in place, including Dukakis. He has the time on his hands. Hell, get Olympia Dukakis.
8. How’s Your Family? No, really, I want to know. I should see your wife and sons making your case. Why? Well, they aren’t idiots and people may just find their real-life stories as appealing as naming your kid after part of a shotgun. Speaking of shotguns, your son Beau is a soldier, don’t be afraid to share the mantle of sacrifice with your competitor. Speaking of shotgun weddings, would you, in the name of Dan Quayle, PLEASE insert some friggin’ Family Values into this race!

7. Get on Top of Your Past Pt. 2. Yeah, at some point they are going to start running ads showing you suggesting a Kerry-McCain ticket in 2004. Those clips are better than porn to Rove. Better have a good answer – and it shouldn’t be anything stupid like your Hilary Would Have Been Better Than Me statement.

6. Say Cheese! You have the best teeth ever to run for high office since 1960. Use them! You are warm and funny, you don’t have a scowl or a deer-in-headlights glaze. At the debate you should laugh…often. Every time she says something like "I've read most of them, again with a great appreciation for the press, for the media,” when asked what specific newspapers or magazines she gets her news from. Laugh and say “And you were a journalism major?” or “Great appreciation? You’ve got to be kidding.” I think the color incredulous is the right shade for you this Thursday.

5. Don’t Play Sun City. In the Eighties you were a loud voice against the Reagan Administration’s terrible policies which supported investment in apartheid South Africa. That leadership helped frame a national moral stance which I believe was more important than any Reagan speech telling the Russians to “tear down” a wall that was already crumbling. No, the USA led a world movement to provide true liberty to a nation without ever pulling a trigger.

4. Get On Top of Your Past Pt. 3. You know, Joe, you know. They have yet to fight. There is a bunker somewhere under Karl’s Kave in which a loop of your “He’s articulate and bright and clean” is playing over a bed of Mantovani. Let your running mate make the joke about it in your presence.

3. Hey, Joe, You’re 65! Your opponents do not like sexist attacks, and thinks their nominee is “experienced.” However you are old (to her) and she loves to mockingly point out that you entered the Senate when she was in 2nd grade. That just makes her ageist. And possibly unaware that her running mate is 6 years older than you. Tell her off for mocking your service to your country and suggest that if she had studied those speeches from your Senate career, she may be able to answer questions without having to “get back” to the reporter with an answer!

2. And another thing… Don’t let the nuances get lost. When Palin attacks your longevity in Congress, please point out that in your last re-election you won 53% of the vote and pulled in more votes than her “Maverick Reformer” win in equally small Alaska two years ago! You are still viable! (For doubters, just know that I also do not think McCain is too old to be President. I think he's too crazy and dangerously ignorant, but not too old)

1. Put the Needle On the Record Put the Needle On the Record Put the Needle on the Record. Joe Biden you can honestly claim a history of doing the right thing. Bipartisan work with Bush to boost his global AIDS portfolio, Violence Against Women Act, tons of cops on the street and a declining crime rate in direct correlation, drug prevention beyond Just Say No, actually calling a war criminal a “war criminal” to his face and pushing for our involvement in Bosnia, and a relentless attempt to get people to challenge this Administration’s failed Iraq policies. You just never seem to get those things out before you say something stupid.

Deja Vu All Over Again

I keep having conversations with my best friend which are nearly identical to those we had four years ago. I am panicked, angry, and vehement about not being further ahead in the polls. He is cool, calm, and thoughtful. I say we should be 15 points ahead going into November 4th. He says its all about the 270 electoral votes, and not to worry. The polling on the ground in those crucial states indicates we will get by with the 270. His theory is that a few points lead is better than nothing, and that momentum is on our side.

This is a smart guy, one of the smartest people I know. Right about most everything, and an enviable talent for getting the big picture. But, I was right to be worried in October of 2004, and I am not seeing anything, yet, that is convincing enough to make me believe this year is wholly different. Save for the more appealing, younger, richly talented candidate, the 2008 Democratic Presidential Campaign continues to lack the punch I believe is necessary to celebrate November 5th.

Take the debate (please!). Obama walked in strong and came out strong. But, McCain walked in weak and came out strong. Obama had at least three opportunities to put it all away, and I mean ALL of it, and he played it safe. Hey, I totally get not combating crazy with crazy, but when your opponent refers to himself as a "maverick" in such a ridiculous manner, you have to pounce and make it memorable. Exhume Bentsen: "I have known mavericks in my life, these are people who speak truth to both power and to the people (fill in the obligatory identifiable crusader, try Richard Clarke, although I may still be the only one who wonders why we do not have statues of him in every park - I'd even be okay with an MLK reference), and you sir cannot embrace George Bush and his tragic policies, employ millionaire lobbyists, and completely embrace the far right wing of the right wing in an election year and call yourself a maverick. You, sir, are no maverick."

[Do you ever wonder why McCain has stopped referring to his maverickness in going after Jack Abramoff? Read this.]

I know, Bentsen did not become VP. But let's remember, he won the debate. Mike Dukakis lost the election. Debates are won and lost on soundbites and playable clips. Obama, of all people, should understand (hell, he's the only candidate of the four who seems to embrace the technology of the last quarter century!) that in a YouTube/Tivo/iTunes world, people don't want the whole pie, just a slice of the good stuff. Have you watched the post debate-coverage? They are struggling to find a representative clip. Barack's answers were too long, McCain's are too confusing (and errant) so for different reasons, they do not get played. Leaving folks to discuss the inability of McCain to look to his left, and the seemingly polite Obama hitch for saying "John is right" before making a contrary point. Hardly the stuff of knockout.

In future debates there are three simple statements Obama can make, honestly, that will be played ad infinitum:
1. Look right into the camera and say “Hey, Osama bin Laden and all other terrorists – be scared of me, ‘cause I’m not taking my eye off of you.” Red meat wins over undecideds and maybe even those Republicans who still feel 9/11 has not been dealt with.
2. Turn to McCain and say “John, I don’t even think you believe half of the stuff that comes out of your mouth.” Humor always trumps grumpy.
3. Play the hits: “Are you better off now than you were 8 years ago?” “It’s not the economy, stupid, it’s that John McCain and the republicans have given us a stupid economy!” That one, by the way, is the punch you missed in the first three minutes of Friday’s event. Going out on the stump the day after the debate (a Saturday when nobody but me watches TV) and pointing out how McCain never mentioned the middle class is a wasted punch that would have landed squarely Friday night.

McCain spent a week handing over the election to Obama, and in the debate literally turned his back to give Barack a free shot. Is it enough to be 3-9 points ahead in the polls? Ask Al Gore and John Kerry. Is it enough to have higher registration numbers than the other party? Ask Al Gore and John Kerry. Is it enough to have a seasoned, smarter, more eloquent Vice Presidential Nominee going after an inexperienced, clueless, dangerous, populist newcomer in a debate? Ask Mike Dukakis.

Here's a lost cautionary tale from SNL

An Open Letter to Sarah Palin

I have decided to try once again to commit some energy to my My Podcast Killed the Radio Star blog. I will be working on posting some cool tunes, video and podcasts soon. But in the meantime, I have been wanting a place to unwind some of my thoughts on the state of the world. The very reason I hate blogs is that they give some the inflated notion that what they are writing is being construed as news, or at the very least, needed. This blog is not news. Nor is it neccessarily neccessary.


Top Ten Things I Want to Say to Sarah Palin (and notice, NONE of the following refer to her gender, overpopulated family’s lack of traditional conservative “family values,” barbaric hunting practices, can’t-wait-to-see-him-in-a-foreign-diplomat-receiving-line-son-in-law, not-so-much-on-the-U-part-of-USA-husband, her very own Rev. Wright, or Tina Fey’s sexist, soundless, portrayal*)

*I will cover those in a separate letter. This one is about experience, governance and policy – the three things that matter most when choosing a National Leader.

10. “Hold Me Accountable.” I want a National Leader who deals in Straight Talk™. So if you say “Hold me accountable,” and then refuse (or urge others to refuse) to participate in an investigation launched PRIOR to your being plucked from obscurity, and approved by an overwhelming majority of your own party, because now you say it is “partisan”…then you are lying. Which is the opposite of Straight Talk™.

9. The word is “nu-cle-ar.” Not “nu-cu-lar.” I know that’s how George W. Bush pronounces it; but yesterday he also said Wall Streeters who break laws will be “persecuted.” Can’t we all at least agree that our National Leaders should have some ability to speak without reading? I know you all hate that darn Department of Education and teachers are just thorns in your sides, but American children deserve both when their National Leaders resolve to be mediocre.

8. Which leads me to My Least Favorite Lie. When you told a group of Ohioans at a fundraiser that the teleprompter broke during your RNC speech, forcing you to look upon the Ohio delegation and speak in an impromptu manner from your heart, you were not at all telling the truth. And what makes it a more outrageous lie is that you could have just said, “Having the Ohio contingency in front of me gave me the strength to make the biggest speech of my life blah blah blah” and that would have just been disingenuous and a little smarmy. Instead you chose to be completely cynical. The fact is the teleprompter never broke. Hundreds of people could see it the entire time you read from it.

7. The Problem With Not Knowing The Bush Doctrine (its not what you may think). Yes, I knew what the Bush Doctrine was when Charlie Gibson asked you the first time. In fact, I thought it was a great question. It is easily the most significantly articulated dictum of foreign policy in our time. So, you didn’t know what it was. Okay. But then quickly the defenses came. George Will said he didn’t know what it was. Lie. And if it’s not a lie, how sad for every viewer who ever watched him report on foreign affairs or ask questions of guests on a Sunday morning. Can conservative “journalists” really ask questions or comment about a subject and then flush it completely out of their memory? I believe Tim Russert knew the Bush Doctrine – even if he didn’t he at least read up on it before asking a question. Can you imagine somebody with all of your foreign policy experience not at least reading up on it before the biggest interview of their life? And the others, like McCain flack Tucker Bounds, claiming that every primary debate candidate had to have it explained before answering as well. That, now, is my real problem. First, I doubt every candidate had to have it explained (wouldn’t your party at least want to suggest McCain knew?) But if that’s the case, as say the right-wing spin peddlers, that it was articulated in the Primary Debates – then shouldn’t you have been watching? I mean, you are running for the same office essentially. How about a newspaper? Or Time? Or Hannity and Colmes? I’ve been to Alaska’s best cruise ports. All those towns had t.v., newspapers, and magazines.

And yes, by taking that cruise to Alaska, I have put myself in running for either Secretary of Transportation, or Mayor of Skagway.

6. The Mayor of Simpleton** . Be a proud Mayor, but don’t equate it with anything more than what it is. I meet nearly once a month with the Mayor of a small city much larger than Wasilla. Like yours, our city also has a strong City Council which shares in governance with the Mayor; often directed by the City Manager or Administrator. The Mayor is a great guy. He is, however, in no way prepared to govern the State of California. We already have an Actor in place doing just fine…er…well, he’s trying. But the Mayor of My Small Town should be proud to speak at high school graduations (although he does not get asked), and should settle land and water use disputes, although the entire Council does that. So when he leaves office, even if for some strange reason he brought in millions of dollars in congressional earmarks, or takes the credit for any budget windfall or loss, he will not be equating his multiple terms with national power. He won't call himself a "Maverick reformer" for telling the Elks to be more like the Rotarians. Nor should you.

By the way. Stop feigning insult when somebody points out the size of your town, and then turn around and make speeches extolling your virtues as a small-town hockey mom. You are being vetted for the first time by Americans. They wonder if your management experience equals the types of challenges you might face as President. Your small-town virtues aren't policy ideologies, nor are they serious answers to the difficult questions that face this Nation. They are silly platitudes which give us no insight as to how you might run a Country. Many Presidents have come from small towns, but it was not their ABUNDANCE of values or LACK of ideas which got them elected - it was their ability to articulate how those values affect their ability to craft policy.
**right-click to download the XTC track

5. Seriously, having victims of rape pay for their own rape kits is, like, so Cruella DeVille. But since that seems a sexist comparison…how about: It is so Sadaam Hussein? Now, this may seem unfair. But you are campaigning as an experienced leader. If that is true, you should answer questions from the public. As a parent and family person like you, I kinda believe you do not agree with this policy. If we are to believe the assertion that you are strong on sexual assault and domestic violence issues, and you ran Wasilla, then since we have nothing to go on but your local media, we must also be allowed to conclude that you are a weak manager either unaware or unable to stop this ridiculous practice under your purview. So which is it? Is this the question that keeps you sequestered? So many to choose from.

4. Did you blink? You told Charlie you didn’t blink when McCain called you and asked you by phone to be his veep pick. Yet you told Hannity that first you had to pass it by the family. Why should answers be different when they are a week apart? I understand that politically, a week is like a year for somebody else in National politics, but either you are being disingenuous to your family or the ABC viewing public. Neither of which seems fair.

3. Blind Faith. So let’s say I looked past every rookie gaffe and ignored subpoena. Let’s say I found you charming and folksy enough to handle “’nü-klē-ər” proliferation talks with Iran, or accept the hypothetical premise of “’nü-klē-ər” war with Russia (your lowest moment in my opinion). What I cannot seem to believe is that a multiple-college educated person like yourself would stand by while your running mate (although I did appreciate how you and Freud tried to bury him by announcing the Palin-McCain ticket!) appears to be so absolutely unfit to govern. His choice of you should make you wonder about his capacity to be the most powerful person on the planet. Plus, he has made up more untruths about you than…well…you! You know more about energy than anybody else in America. Did you at least chuckle? You never allowed for earmarks as Governor. Now, on that one you may just still be confused at to what that means, so I’ll let it go. And, my favorite: Her son is in the Alaska National Guard. You know that he isn’t, right? And that you’d have absolutely no authority over him if he was thanks to…wait for it…the Republicans in Washington and George Bush (Obama voted Aye as well). Your boy is in the Army. You chose his moment of deployment to make a political speech incorrectly linking Iraq to 9/11. Seriously, they have newspapers up there. I have seen them.

2. God’s Will. It is not God’s Will for there to be war. It was not God’s Will for you to be Governor. It was not God’s Will for the Alaska Pipeline to be built. Stop the Extremist Fundamentalism that you so want others to fear. We do not live in a small town anymore. The U.S. is a big city in a bigger metropolis. It is diverse, it has problems, and it has more than a million ways to show faith and patriotism. Stop going to church if all you get from it is political capital. Stop going to church when the leaders of your church tell you something you (should) know is absolutely untrue. If you want to lead My US of A, then you gotta want to respect ALL of it.

1. You Are No Jimmy Stewart. Nor Are You Remotely Abraham Lincoln. Listen, I know you like George W. A lot of people did, and some still do. He was the guy you wanted to have a beer with, unlike that stuffy ol’ Al Gore and that boring John Kerry. Those jerks, with their big words, global idealism, and Ivy-league education (yes, I know Bush went to Yale part-time) talking down to Americans with their know-it-all-ness. But here’s the thing. America is a proud nation that wants to be respected in the World. We want our leaders to have a command of the same language they want to make every child and immigrant speak. So stop saying the economy needs “fixin.” Stop referring to voters as “guys and gals.” Finally, Stop telling American children and those uninformed parents that lying is fine, as long as you say ‘Thanks…and No Thanks.”